My letter to Sam Schaeffer

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Continuing with the theme of how to manifest positivity every time you need it..

I first read Sam’s story on Tuesday 18th September 2018, nearly 27 years after becoming ill myself. I think you could say his story resonated! In fact it was the first time I understood my fear of rejection and humiliation. AND I could see how they were related to my stored or repressed anger. The doctor’s called it M.E. it was also similar to Parkinson’s or loads of other illnesses with similar symptoms.. labelling things is such a control thing isn’t it?

But thanks to Sam I was able to see how Social Anxiety when it’s allowed to escalate can become almost any illness in the medical dictionary.

So on Wednesday I relived a childhood memory around my relationship with my father. This was a real EUREKA moment aaahhhh I have a lot to be grateful for to a lot of people but thank you Sam for putting it all into context. You too can read the whole of Sam’s story here..

(Although I don’t think folk are lazy I think they lack courage and are afraid of feeling their fear of anxiety.)

So believing in yourself and having self esteem are essential but grieving is even more important and leads us to release that stored away anger from our bodies, minds or souls that you were taught was wrong to express… even when you were being attacked at school or on the street either emotionally or physically…

It’s important to realise that anger cleanses and protects us and it can cleanse your relationships when they get stagnant through familiarity, it’s a great tool but we’re taught at an early age that it’s wrong so none or very few of us have good practise in using it as a tool to help us. (Society are afraid of conflict but condone war – what a contradiction!) This is why so many of us go to football matches as it’s one place where it’s acceptable to vent our spleens!!

Men don’t cry that’s unfortunate social grooming too but they can ground energy and cleanse their anger away into the earth and so can women during meditation using breathing techniques.

Knowing and accepting your flaws helps you accept other people’s flaws too. My Mum and Dad where far from perfect they had flaws when it came to explain social etiquette to a child of 3 years!


After feeling and releasing anger, sadness or fear it’s important to manifest something uplifting straightaway. I sing, talk, write, play piano or alchemy singing bowls that are a sublime way to lift repression and help us flawed humans to feel again.

I use to need to talk and be heard so much I produced and presented a radio show. It gave me this huge high but it didn’t solve my repressed anger issues. The only way I have managed that is like Sam change my perspective of what might or might not happen and instead of wiring my brain to overload thinking of all the possible scenario’s – I don’t. I stop asking why and what if and accept and trust all that life gives me and I’m grateful for just having that life.

We can build self esteem and self belief together by doing what we’ve always wanted to do but have allowed social etiquette or constraints or judgement to stop us. Let’s be brave by seeing our anger as power and holding that power in our hand and using it for the good of ourselves and our planet.. don’t waste it by giving it away…but invest it in healing ourselves feel that power (it’s also energy, money..) in your hand and retain and don’t give it away willy nilly. Visualise it in your hand every morning when you wake up and every night before you go to sleep and ask yourself how am I going to use my power to help today.


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